this song is from of one of my very favorite movies.. if you ever have the chance to watch "return to me," ya GOTTA! the scene with this song in it is the happiest! and gosh i just love it.
often, the first thought of my day is not "i need more of God!" or "i have to have Him, have to spend time with Him before i can even think about breakfast!" or "breakfast can wait, i need God more than i need food!"
those thoughts are beautiful to me, and i'm so excited for when i get to that place of being so constantly aware of my need for Him, but right now, i'm not there yet. this could be so discouraging, but instead this is where something i learned this summer that i have tucked in my heart comes in handy... God is okay with us being on a journey. He knows i'm not at that place yet, and He knows i'm on a journey. He knows i'm getting there and i don't have it all together. for you, too, friend! we don't need to be discouraged about where we still need growth because God knows we're not there yet and He is patient with our journey. (which is not meant to say we can take it easy and not pursue growth, but this is for our mindsets as we move through growth)
but one of the things i desire for every single person, including myself, is that we would be made so aware of our dependence on God. so that is my prayer, if you'll join me, that we would become so humbly aware of our reliance and dependence on God in every area of our lives. one of the things that really stuck with me from when francis chan spoke at the onething conference this past weekend, is when he said, "God, we are only able to take our next breath because You have allowed it!" ...our next breath! too easily i forget! even our very breaths are not our own!
like these little plants can't make it without the care of sun and water, neither can we without God. the minute we forget our need for Him is the minute we become self-sustaining, and the minute that our self-sustaining efforts lead to our self-destruction. let's pray that God never loses His place as Lord of our lives.
my sisters and i had lunch with my mom downtown today and she showed us around her building in the target headquarters. one thing i found to be incredibly cool to witness was all of the little meetings going on all around us in the big open areas with couches and tables in the middle of the work day. notes and graphs being shown and coffee-on-the-go and badges and just the buzz of purpose and drive really got to me. mom said there are 12,000 people working in that building. i became so moved at thinking about how this big international corporation exists because of so many minds and thoughts and talents and creativity... because of the buzz that i had witnessed. so many things were being accomplished right before my eyes, and so many people with different responsibilities and vital roles.
so today i want to pray over our passions and gifts. that God would inspire ideas and remind us of our individual giftings and purposes and reveal how He wants to use them to make His name known.
because really, what a thought... using our individual skillsets together in order for God to be known...
He didn't have to use us. He doesn't need us. He can accomplish everything on His own. But the thing that gets me, is He chooses to use us. He chooses to work through the gifts He's given us and chooses for us to be a part of what He is doing. what a wonderfully good Father.
so, something i really desire in my life is more prayer, which most days means i need to ask God even to have that desire to pray because usually prayer intimidates me and confuses me and sometimes, honestly, i just really don't want to. (which, i do realize is okay if i do not want to, because we're not always gonna feel like doing necessary and good things), but the problem comes in when i allow these things to hinder me from doing it. and lately i have noticed squirminess within me when i have any amount of time dedicated to prayer, which i have found to be the first inclination of being out of practice with prayer. (this is not to say that when you are more in practice with coming before God in prayer you will not feel squirmy about it,) but i think there is a lot of continual, day-to-day, even-when-it's-terribly-dry-and-i-don't-want-to-pray-for-that-person practice involved with learning what things God is impressing on your mind and in understanding the ways He speaks.
what i know about prayer is that it is vital and essential to the life of a follower of Christ. as God's ambassadors (a person who acts as a representative) on earth (2 Cor 5:20), and as His dearly loved children, prayer is of extremely high importance.
so, i had the thought that for the month of january, i will provide a prompt for prayer focus each day. this is not to say that you can't pray for anything else that day, or even that you have to participate, but while i'm home for break for most of this month and with it being a brand new year (happy 2014, hey!), i thought this would be prime time to take a good hard look at my life and do some adjusting and rearranging of things that shouldn't be there, and really dedicate myself to prayer. so you should join me if ya wanna! i just really like the idea of this blog being a place where people are reminded to pray.
so here's day one: let's pray for our dads
for his discovery of God in whatever way that might be for him (maybe he doesn't know God yet or maybe he's known Him for his whole life and needs to discover that God is his friend or his king, whatever the case, the beauty is there's always more growth and more discovery, and more characteristics of God to be learned).
for leadership. it is biblically clear that God has put men in the role of leadership in homes, and i just think it's so important to ask God for clarity and guidance in direction of leadership, or maybe for your dad it means asking God for things like the overcoming of passivity and fear, in order to lead in his life.
for refreshment. encouragement and things brought in his path that would inspire joy in him.
for whatever specific thing you feel God might be pressing you towards (that's where listening and waiting for God's prompting comes in)
hey, thanks, God, for dads.
***disclaimer: this is a collection of my thoughts as i grapple with the mysterious thing that prayer is to me. these are just some of the things that i have gathered as i continue to learn, and there is a very large chance that i could be wrong or off with my thoughts, so please consider this as you read and i encourage you to challenge and probe and inquire of God and His word about prayer and any of these ideas that i bring up!***
for austin and emily and james. such a privilege in so closely experiencing each of their beautiful hearts and what God is doing in them. each one just so dear to me. three gifts, truly.
for 60 degrees and fresh air and sunshine
for holding becca's hand
for new cities and sights
for emily's great care for me when I was feeling sick and crappy and tired... what a gracious friend!
for seeing how knowing Jesus & His love can cause people to care so so well, especially for our group this weekend, and house us and feed us and pray over us... i mean, wow!
for so many instances of praying with people i'd never met before... ya know, what a cool thing!
for the ability to just be with becca. she's just like a breath of fresh air. coffee shops in new cities with her.
for so many strangers turned friends.
for seeing so many people gathered to discover God.
for austin's love for people. he's really good at it.
for convictions and heart stirs.
for God thinking about me.
for God desiring me, just as i am; to be my friend and my Father and my king.
for emily's whiney voice. (:
for learning, and always learning.
for long car rides and singing auld lang syne
for discovering things about each other. i love that! what a cool thought, discovering people.
for laughter.
for justine and her big huge heart
for kahealani and her sweet and authentic way of living and loving.. (i mean, look at her name.. so cool how much it reflects that)
for having friends who are willing to talk about confusing things, and an environment with them that is one of freedom to express confusion and disagreement.
for new years texts! i love all of those mass holiday texts! haha, but especially sincere, personalized ones.
for prayers with emily before bed. i think that's one of my very favorite things.
for white; for snow wafts on the highway, trees covered, and fields untouched
I’m free to love once and for all And even when I fall I’ll get back up For the joy that overflows my cup Heaven filled me with more than enough Broke down my levees and my bluffs Let the flood wash me.