for a sister who lets me borrow her sweater and lets me hold her hand in the car for a holiday that is dedicated to pausing to be thankful, and together
for fireplaces
for safety
for an aunt who bakes a pumpkin pie just because she knows i love them for pumpkin pie
for my grandpa and how much he loves my gramma
for allison, and that she is in my family and is also my friend
for sweet texts all day long from people who just mean the world to me
for an aunt who gives cheek kisses
for my dad, makin me laugh all day long
for extended time at the table to lounge and talk and be together
for a thanksgiving eve service at church that seriously moved my heart
for mr grow and mrs grow and spencer and j.p. and riley.. each one very special.. they're family to me
for times when i get to grocery shop in target with my dad for being known, and known so deeply
for familiar trails
for lauren draayer
for God giving himself, and everything that comes with that.. (joy, deep love, life, peace, fullness)
i find that today, especially, my heart is troubled at the extent to which i have been given gifts that are ridiculously undeserved. it just doesn't seem okay to have been given so much, and sometimes it just kind of puts me in shock and overwhelms me, almost too much to handle, if i think long enough about the kindness and goodness that God has extended to me throughout my life. so if God is willing to appreciate the measly thanks that comes out of my mouth, i think i will be expressing that thanks as long as i am able. i don't always want to thank God. i snap and disappoint and fall short. i worry and hurt and doubt and i know i have grieved him. but he still chooses every day to love me, and give himself and every one of my needs. so i think i can choose every day to thank him. he is worthy of my life. he is worthy of so much more than my life.