dear english paper,
why can'tchya just write yourself?  do i have to do all the work around here? (;

dear mom and dad,
you're in chicago.  that's pretty cool, i guess.  except wanna take me with next time?  please??

dear becca and ariel,
you two are my favorite sun-chasers!  i find it so darn wonderful that i have friends who will not only gush about the sun with me, but even encourage it!

dear words,
i'm always amazed what you can do and all that you can communicate and how much even one or two of you can touch my heart.

dear popcorn,
what i would give to have a bag of you right now..

dear hannah,
didjya know getting to spend so much time with you yesterday made my day?  well, it did.

dear yellow,
i love you really a lot.  i'm so glad you're a color.  you might even be my favorite, but don't tell pink i said that.

dear rachel,
your beauty of heart blesses me time and time again!  you inspire me and have reminded me that God is my dear Father.  i wish so much that you went to school here...

dear intervarsity men,
you do a really good job at honoring and respecting your sisters!  you sure made us all feel special.  thank you!

dear davies,
thanks for the big whales and octopi hangin around these days!  and those decorative blown up sterile gloves! mhmm!  always keepin things spicy around here! (; thanks for celebrating earth week!

dear oh hellos,
i wonder if i'll ever get sick of you?

dear friends,
each one of you have hearts that blow me away!  it's my great honor to know you and be known by you.  a daily adventure!

dear reader,
create something today!

dear emily,
i miss you.

dear God,
thanks for knowing my heart and hearing my cries and filling me and teaching me and disciplining me.  i am Yours and it's my delight to be!

today was one of those flip-through-your-old-journals/ have-a-good-laugh-and-realize-how-much-you've-grown kinda days (:  but one of the entries from about a year ago really grabbed my heart.  i might have even shed a tiny tear.. probably because i forgot.  i forgot about how thankful i am for who God is and His faithfulness to me, always.  probably because i long for that knowing once again.  this entry is a little cheesy, but ha welcome to the journal of alexi speich (: that's just something i've learned to expect when i look back (: oh boy...

i hope it can bless you & remind you of a part of who God is (the more i live, the more i realize that i don't know & won't ever know the full picture of who He is), like it did for me.  a dearly needed reminder of His nearness to me today, still.

saturday, february 9, 2013 

dear Father,

thank You for Your faithfulness.  thank You for not leaving me in that dry place.  thank You for the way You never stop pursuing me with Your love.  thank You for knowing the layers of my heart.  God, i don't thank You enough!  i don't tell You how wonderful i think You are.  i love that when i lay in bed and the whole world around me is asleep, You remind me that You are in my midst- that You dwell within me, and as i sleep, i know deep within my heart and soul that i am not, or ever will be, alone.  i rest in peace and that strong security in knowing i will never be far from the hand of my Love, my beloved Father.  that You have searched me and You know me.  and, God, what can i say but thank You?  what can i do but give my life to such peace.  what can i help but to love You with every ounce of my being.  You are faithful, my God.  fill me with Yourself-

"when i found myself, i found loneliness and despair;
but when i found Christ, i found Him and everything else."

with my whole heart,

alexi.

dear winter boots,
you're on everyone's feet these days and it just kind of makes me smile to see you so much, and in so many varieties!

dear watercolors,
you've been bringing me joy a lot these days, and are a beautiful means for worship, so hey thanks!  sometimes your colors speak for me when my words cannot.

dear devyn and adam,
you guys make me smile (:

dear anna,
i love your sass and i love your honesty and i love our little inside jokes and i love our pillow talk, but mostly i just really love that you are my roommate.

dear desk,
you've been messy and cluttered these days, but i actually kind of really like you that way, so sorry, but you might just have to deal with it.

dear will reagan,
your soundtrack has been the soundtrack of my heart lately.

dear becca,
you are one of my dearest and closest, treasured friends.  i hope you know that.

dear saturday mornings,
yes. yes yes yes.  i love that you exist!

dear yui,
just, thanks for being in my life and the great joy you bring.  i love when you visit our room and make us laugh so hard and sing lumineers loud with us, and that you wear dinosaur and giraffe onesies out in public.

dear holland,
my gosh, you're talented!  you're like sunshine and i love your beautiful heart.

dear austin,
i like that you say deal and huh and yeah! and i like that you point me to Christ and are adventurous and i like that you ask me questions, and mostly i just like you!

dear gospel music,
ahhhh!  it is my JOY to sing you, and sing you loud.

dear christmas season,
i really really enjoy you and all of the joy you bring, even though i forget you're here sometimes.

dear family,
i'm sorry i haven't been good at talking to you lately, but i just can't wait to hug you and i'm so proud to call you mine!

dear cassie,
oh, you!  yooouuu!  cass, my love for you goes deep.

dear friends,
it is my deep gladness to see the measures you all will go to love each other.  you do it so well and it just blesses me like crazy to see!

dear God,
thank you for sustaining and nourishing and carrying and loving, and thanks for wanting to hear my heart songs.  there is much to thank you for.  i love you.

dear terrarium,
i created you with care, i gave your little succulents plenty of room to grow, i brought you with to college, i loved you... why ya gotta look so wilty and decrepit?
 
dear oh hello's,
oh, hello!  where has your music been all my life?

dear holland,
how did i live this summer without your beautiful soul??

dear bees,
i no longer call you friends.

dear backpack,
i've been asking a lot of you these days, thanks for always rising to the task of carrying my books.

dear becca,
your existence makes my days.

dear research methods,
let's be friends, k?  please?

dear josh garrels,
thank you for stirring up and inspiring creativity in me

dear laura,
uh, yep, still missin you. 

dear "hi, alexi!",
wow you're nice!  you warm my heart!  thanks for making my walks to class enjoyable.

dear dad,
i think every day lately i get a little more thankful that i am your daughter.

dear sunshine,
your warmth is my delight!  sorry when i get whiney... i don't mean it!  you know how i feel about you (:

dear ali,
i miss you, but it's an honor to be your friend.

dear gungor,
thank you for the song "you have me" ...gets me every time!

dear justin,
you always point me to Jesus.  thank you.

dear intervarsity community,
it's a joy to experience life with such wonderful human beings.  you really are family.

dear Jesus,
thank you for your love.  thanks for being the vine.  thanks for never giving up on me, even when i fail you.

dear bike,
you've been faithful since i rode on your back in a baby seat while my dad drove you all those years ago, but now you're squeaky and it might be time to go a different direction.

dear morning sunshine,
you're my favorite.  i'm not sure what it is about you, but i like you more than any other kind of sunshine.  thanks for lighting up my world these past couple days.

dear mom,
thanks for walkin with me this morning.  that's one of my favorite things to do, especially with you.

dear fridge,
every time i open you and see your strawberries or hummus or lemonade or guacamole, i get a little more thankful.  thanks for being so cool. (;

dear anna,
you're in bolivia... holy cow.

dear coral,
you're in haiti... holy cow.

dear puffy sheets on my bed,
yep, you're wonderful.

dear gracie dog,
thanks for not forgetting me when i came home from school. i'm glad you're still my buddy and you follow me around and wake me up in the morning.

dear laura,
i miss all of my friends, but geesh, i just especially miss you.

dear limeade + peach la croix,
you're my favorite summer drink, i think.

dear nicole,
i love you, my friend!

dear jeri the manager,
thank you for being so patient and gracious with me!  i'm still a little rusty at selling those wedding dresses... promise i'll catch up!

dear dad,
thanks for letting me drive your car the other night.  singing at the top of my lungs by myself at night is good for the soul, i'm convinced.

dear Rachel t,
i often thank God for you.

dear eau claire friends,
i miss you. a lot.

dear all sons & daughters,
thank you for the lyrics "We are loved at the end of our rope, when we're less there is more of the Lord"... stopped me in my tracks, they did.

dear God,
i don't deserve the love and life you've given me.  but thank you.
 

dear sunshine,
thank you for coming out today.  i never want you to leave.

dear coral,
i'm so terribly glad you were born.  thanks for the little hotel birthday party fun last night (:

dear m&m's,
you are my weakness.  i hate that you are my weakness.  so does my stomach this morning.

dear dad,
you are probably my favorite person ever.  thanks for being you and always making me laugh.

dear bangs,
sometimes i love you, sometimes i don't.  this morning was an 'i don't' kinda morning.  you were flyin.

dear michelle,
i LOVE that you are my friend.

dear sparkly gold finger nail polish,
you make me really like being a girl (:

dear mom, dad, and sister,
seeing you yesterday was really good for my soul.  i needed that; thank you.  i love you all so much it hurts!

dear syd,
thanks for asking about my heart yesterday.  i love that i have friends who do that.  that means a lot to me.

dear josh garrels,
come to eau claire? please??

dears nooms,
i miss you.

dear coffee,
i like you even without cream!  yay!

dear sophomore year,
why do ya have to go so fast?

dear angela,
thanks for always making me feel so loved.  please never graduate, k?  i've lost sleep over that thought.

dear homework,
i don't really have to work on you, right?  you're more like a suggestion, right?

dear emily,
that text that said 'i miss you' this morning, made my whole day.

and dear Jesus,
i really love you.  thanks for holding me close lately.